So here's parte dos of the relationship posts -- the first one is here, and it's just about human relationships in general. Now let's move on to romantic relationships. WOOT!
*Disclaimer* I'm not a dating expert. I don't have a fantastic track record. But hey, what better thing to do with mistakes than to learn from them? HOLLA! Okay, so first of all, a shout-out to all my single ladiez (and gents)!! This post mostly only applies to those who aren't in romantic relationships right now.
Lately, I've been wrestling with what to do with our desires to be in a romantic relationship. These desires are good and healthy and human, but sometimes what we do with those desires makes all of the difference. I am praying right now for my desires for God to be greater than my desire to be in a relationship.
Sometimes I say to myself, "well okay, I'm not in a relationship right now, and that's okay. It's actually fine and lovely," but then I start fantasizing about the future and thinking about any future relationships I might be in. Even though I'm not looking to date anyone right now, I still yearn for someone in the future to be there. I want to share my life with somebody some day, and sometimes I find myself daydreaming or fantasizing about that person (even if I don't know who it will exactly be) or what it will be like. Now moderate curiosity is no problem and it's sometimes fun to wonder about the future. But sometimes I try to convince myself that by doing this, I am preparing myself for a future relationship. I think that by reflecting upon my relational future, I am slowly preparing myself for a healthy relationship. But this is wrong. That's not the best way that I can prepare. For me, thinking about my future partner right now is actually not productive.
So for all you lovely, single people out there -- let's be productive with our time now. The way that we can most efficiently and effectively prepare for our relational features is to pursue God now. I don't need to work on myself in order to make me a more attractive candidate to be a girlfriend. I don't need to fantasize about what I want in a significant other or who might make me happy or whatever. I need to focus on my relationship with God, the most important relationship of all. Whether you're single or not, your most valued relationship should be with God. And He's always pursuing us. We don't have to wait for Him to be interested in us. He is already interested, even when we don't feel super interesting. Seeking God now is practical preparation for a romantic relationship in the future. It is not a passive thing to do in the meantime while I'm still single. And even more, I can praise and seek God in my singleness, even if I don't want to be single for the rest of my life.
God can purify, cleanse, and direct my heart now so that I can be more prepared to have a blessed, edifying relationship with someone later.
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